Thought Catalog

Minsan nagawi ako sa isang pasugalan,
aking pinanood ang mga taong naroroon.
Inusisa ang kanilang mga ginagawa,
Inisa isa ang bawat mukha.
Nagmatyag ako,
nakinig sa kanilang ingay.
Di ko inaasahang dito ay magulo,
magulo pala ang mundong ito.

Napatanong ako sa isa sa mga nanonood,
“Bakit dito sa lugar na ito, hindi lahat nananalo?”
“Dahil ang mundo ay hindi patas kung maglaro.
Hindi ka mananalo kung hindi ka handang magpatalo.”
Sabi niya.
“Eh kung naririto ka, bakit hindi ka pa tumataya?”
“Dahil ayokong itaya kung ano ang meron ako,
dito larong puno lamang ng pagbabaka-sakali.”


  • – Pagsugal // 25th of March 2017
Uncategorized

100 Words: Entry 02

Nung araw na iyon, bigla siyang nagpakita. Hindi ako makapaniwalang nasa harapan ko sya at ako ay lumuluha. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin. Tatayo lang ba o lalapit. Tatawagin niya kaya ako o ako ang tatawag sa pangalan niya. Pinaghalong kaba, saya at takot ang nararamdaman ko. Masaya akong makita siya muli makalipas ang tatlong taong biglaang pag-alis. Labis akong nananabik na makausap siya at malaman ang mga nangyari sa buhay niya. Takot dahil alam kong marami nang nag-iba. Hindi ko lang alam, sa tatlong taon ako pa rin ba ang mahal niya o baka naghintay lang ako sa wala.

Uncategorized

Oh, hi my head bang king <3

On this day, 22nd of March 2017, and my friend request got accepted. My head bang king, my favorite bassist – Jason Rondero of Silent Sanctuary and Brisom. And I can’t move on.

It was 30th of September 2016 when I started to like him and became a huge fan. There was a college night at Malayan Colleges of Laguna and his band, Silent Sanctuary was invited to play. Supposedly, I should be in front of my favorite member of the band, Chino David, the violinist and back-up vocals, but because of the crowd, I was on the other side of the stage. Yes, in front of this hot and cool guy, Jason. That was the first time I ever noticed him playing bass guitar intensely and passionately. 100 pogi points!

I can’t forget that moment, when I was taking a video of him while playing their very own Kundiman. I waved my hand at him and mouthed hi, I was hoping he will ever notice me at least just for a single glance. And he did, hs waved his hand back and smiled at me. Kitang kita doon sa video ko yung ganda nung smile niya at kung gaano siya kagwapo. I admit, he really looks cool and astig when he play his bass guitar, when he backs up on vocals, when he grooves and make head bangs, wen he make jump shots. Waaa! Ang puso ko. Paano?

After that night, I started stalking him on Twitter, Instagram and WordPress. He even replied some of my comments there, and pinupusuan niya rin yung mga pictures na ti-nag ko sa kanya. And now, we’re literally friends on Facebook. Isa na ito sa mga dream goals ng lahat ng mga fan girls sa mundo, maging friends nila sa Fb yung mga hinahangaan nila.

And as I continue to like him, I’m looking forward to have a photo with him. And even a video message congratulating me because my graduation is in weeks now. I also want him to remember me as one of his fans who always want to watch Silent Sanctuary’s gigs every now and then. But I know it’s impossible for now. Ah, basta! Friends na kami sa Fb. Waaaa!

Disclaimer: Below is from his bio on shoppersguide.com.ph

About Jason Rondero

Jason plays bass for Silent Sanctuary and Brisom. A League of Legends and anime/cartoons junkie, he hates not finishing one’s food and sleeps most comfortably with a blanket even when it’s hot. He also just recently mended his lost ties with desserts and the beach. His personal blog is: https://pseudoquintessence.wordpress.com/

Books

I Wrote this for You, PleaseFindThis

On this day, you read something that moved you and made you realize there were no more fears to fear. No tears to cry. No head to hang in shame. That every time you thought you’d offended someone, it was all just in your head and really, they love you with all their heart and nothing will ever change that. That everyone and everything lives on inside you. That that doesn’t make any of it any less real.

That soft touches will change you and stay with you longer than hard ones.

That being alone means you’re free. That old lovers miss you and new lovers want you and the one with is the one you’re meant to be with. That the tingles running down your arms are angel feathers and they whisper in your ear, constantly, if you choose to hear them. That everything you happen, will happen if you decide you want it enough. That every time you think a sad thought, you can think a happy one instead.

That you control that completely.

That the people who make you laugh are more beautiful than beautiful people. That you laugh more than you cry. That crying is good for you. That crying is good for you. That the people you hate wish you would stop and you do too.

That you friends are reflections of the best parts of you. That you are more than the sum total of the things you know and how you react to them. That dancing is sometimes more important than listening to the music.

That the most embarrassing, awkward moments of your life are only remembered by you and no one else. That no one judges you when you walk into a room and all they really want to know, s if you’re judging them. That what you make and what you do with your time is more important than you’ll ever fathom and should be treated as such. That the difference between a job and art is passion. That neither defines who you are. That talking to strangers is how you make friends.

That bad days end but smile can go around the world. That life contradicts itself, constantly. That that’s why it’s worth living.

That the difference between love and pain is time. That love is only as real as you want it to be. That if you feel good, you look good but it doesn’t always work the other way around.

That the sun will rise each day and it’s up to you each day if you match it. That nothing matters up until this point. That what you decide now, in this moment, will change the future. Forever. That rain is beautiful.

And so are you.

 

Thought Catalog

100 Words.

Isang daang mga salita. Susubukan kong sumulat at ilathala sa pamamagitang ng maikling talata. Aking ipapahayag ang mga pinakatatagu-tagong damdamin at lihim, ang mga kwento sa bawat saya, tawa, lungkot, galit at hagulgol. Maging ang mga pangyayaring hindi ko nanaising makalimutan o mga taong naging malaki ang parte sa bawat araw na dadaan. Pipiliting hindi magkaroon ng labis o ng kulang, sa halip ito’y magiging sakto lamang. Alam kong hindi magiging madali, kakailanganin ng pangmatagalang pag-eensayo. Kakailanganing mag-aral upang makahanap ng mga salitang magiging angkop sa bawat talata na aking ililikha. Kailangan ko maglaan ng oras para sa aking sarili.

Fan Girl

12th of February 2017 Part 2,

Last year palang nagpepray na ako na sana makapanood ulit ako ng gig ng Silent Sanctuary. Nagkaroon naman sila ng gig malapit lapit sa akin kaso ako naman itong hindi makakarating kaya sobrang naghihinayang ako.

Tapos ayun nga, may nag-tag sa akin sa facebook page nila. Nasa Robinsons Sta. Rosa pala sila sa February 12, 2017. Edi nangontrata na ako ng mga makakasama. Pero kahit naman walang kasama, tutuloy pa rin ako manood. Tapos ayun nga, may activity pala kami sa church namin. Pero dahil mahal ko sila at bihirang makita, tumakas ako. Sorry na nga.

Nanood muna kami ng Spoken Word Poetry ni Maimai Cantillano sa Pavillion. Mga 4:30pm na kami nakaalis doon, eh 5pm yung sa Silent Sanctuary. Tsaka sakto yung oras nila, salang agad sila.

Dumating kami sa place tapos sobrang dami na ng tao. As in, wala na kaming masingitan para makita sila ng maayos. Kahit sa second at third floor, negative din. Walang choice, sumiksik kami sa gilid malapit sa backstage. Kita lang namin yung likod nila, tapos konting singit pa kita na rin yung right side ni Jason. ๐Ÿ˜

Kahit na wala na si Chino at may iba na syang kapalit, ang galing galing pa rin nila. Medyo bitin na nga lang ang tugtugan at talagang ramdam mong nag iba ng konti yung tugtugan nila. Pero ang lupit pa rin nila. They are worth the wait.

Tapos bago matapos ang tugtugan nila, may pakulo pala. May ibibigay pala silang roses sa crowd. Aba, kahit artificial lang yun. Feeling mo ikaw na ang pinakamasayang nilalang sa mundo. Ang cute nga ni Jason eh, pumunta muna sa backstage para magsuot ng jacket tsaka nagbigay ng rose. Ang cute niya. Ang cute niyang kiligin. Super! Hindi ko na nakita yung iba eh, kay Jason lang ako nakafocus ang tingin ko. Charot!

Tapos ayun, after nila tumugtog. Nandoon kami sa tapat ng backstage. Habang nagpapalit sila ng damit, nagbabakasakaling makapagpicture. Ang tagal naming naghihintay at nakaabang. Pinapasok nila kasi sa may dressing room yung mga may cds, yung admin ng fan club nila.

Tapos may isang fan doon, lumingon sa amin. May papel kasi akong hawak na may nakasulat na, “Jason, papicture naman.” Ngumiti sya tapos sabi ko ate picturan mo sila. Binigay ko yung phone ng kasama ko na nagbabakasakali rin. Tapos yung papel na hawak ko, pinalitan ko ang nakasulat. “Happy birthday, zelle! ๐Ÿ™‚” tapos inabot ko kay ate girl. Nung una nawawalan na ako ng pag-asa kasi ang daming pinapauna eh. Tsaka syempre, pag kaharap mo na sila wala ka ng ibang iisipin basta magkaroon lang kayo ng picture. Ayun, sumisilay na lang ako kay Jason. Tapos pumasok na si ate girl. Paglabas niya, sabi nya nalobat daw yung fone namin kaya hindi na nakapagvideo. Pero nakapag papicture naman kasama nga lang sila. Ugh, hawak niya yung papel ko guys! Okay okay, so paano kumalma?! Ugh! Omg!

JpegJpegJpegJpegJpeg

Fan Girl

12th of February 2017 Part 1,

Matagal nang nakaplano na manonood ako ng gig ng Silent Sanctuary whenever I have the chance. I’ve been waiting for them since November 2016. At sobra ko silang namiss, kaya sobrang nag-grab na ako ng chance kahit na may activity sa church namin. (Tumakas ako! Haha). Eh nagkataong may gig din yung isang spoken word artist sa kalapit na mall, so pinuntahan ko na rin namin. Kasama ko nga pala si Jelai at Ate Mina. Haha.

So, ganito yun. We left at 12:30pm para pumunta nang Pavillion since doon magpeperform si Maimai Cantillano – spoken word artist. May ticket daw so we decided na doon nalang kami sa labas nung harang manonood since we need to leave naman for Silent Sanctuary. Nagkataon naman na while we’re waiting eh lumabas sya kasama yung team niya para pumunta sa comfort room. Nung una nga hindi pa kami sigurado kung siya yun, until nilapitan namin. Lucky us, she let us to have a photo with her. Ang liit niya lang pala, haha. But she’s very nice. Nagtethank you rin siya sa mga nagpapicture sa kanya tapos may bow pa. Haha, cute.

The show was a talent showcase. So, it was composed of the local artists from different local talent agencies. Fast forward na kay Maimai, ayun nga. Nagperform siya accompanied with her guitarist na may itsura din. She performed first her hit poetry and the most trending one, “Sa Pagitan Kita Natagpuan“. I’ve read some of the lines of the poem but I haven’t watch any videos of her performing it. At shemaaay, ang sakit sakit! Next, she performed the one that’s in the music video ofย Ang Dating Tayo byย Tj Monterde, “Ang Dating Tayo“. Sabi niya nga, may mga nagmessage sa kanya asking for the complete version of the poem kasi sobrang bitin nga. Pero yun na daw talaga yun. Before niyang iperform yung tula, kinanta niya yung 1st stanza tsaka yung chorus. No offensement, pero mas minahal ko yung version ni Maimai Cantillano. Kahit na crush ko si Tj Monterde, mas naappreciate ko yung kay Maimai. Mas masakit pakinggan kasi babae ang kumanta tapos full of emotions pa, hindi birit tsaka ย yung boses niya buong buo. Magaling pala siya kumanta. Yun talaga yung pinakafavorite kong ginawa niya, yung kumanta siya. Haha. Lastly, she performed “Tahanan”, she said it was her second time to perform that poem. Puro nga naman kasi hugot yung mga ginawa niyang tula so why not try a new one, about love. Maganda rin naman.

It was unexpected. Very unexpected. Though, I already planned to watch a gig of Spoken Word Poetry kaya lang hindi ko naman alam kung saan sila matatagpuan. Achievement unlocked!

The next day, she posted a photo of her with my favorite, Juan Miguel Severo. It was her first time seeing him at sabi niya napadaan lang daw si JMS doon sa lugar kung nasaan siya. Hindi nga daw siya prepared that time. Nagcomment nga ako sa photo nila, sana mag collab sila. Nilike ni Maimai. Pero sana mag collab silaaaa.